Question Authority!

This week is a deeper reflection on teachings from Sacred Instructions by Sherri Mitchell, particularly her exploration of dependency and compliance as a core feature of colonizing systems.

I’ve been a social justice activist since my twenties. At first I believed that if people (men) knew they were oppressing us that they would change. That’s not a reliable strategy! I have taken strong action against the patriarchy and colonizing systems. For the last few decades, I have focused also on our nervous system and healing trauma created by these unjust systems. We need a comprehensive understanding of how systems of oppression work to effect change and we need to build strong resilient nervous systems and communities.

Dependency is often misunderstood as weakness or failure. Instead we can see it as something learned, conditioned, and reinforced over time through paternalistic structures.

In a dependent society, we are trained to believe we cannot solve our own problems. This training does not rely on force alone. It unfolds gradually through systems that reward obedience and discourage discernment and agency. External authority becomes internalized. We learn which voices matter, which questions are acceptable, and when it is safer to comply than to challenge. What may have begun as a survival strategy becomes habit that we no longer question.

How Dependency Is Conditioned

Paternalistic systems position those in power as caretakers who claim to know what is best for everyone else. Decisions are made on our behalf, often framed as protection or benevolence. When this pattern is repeated through institutions such as church, government, and education, dependency becomes normalized. We are subtly taught to doubt our own judgment and defer responsibility upward.

This conditioning is reinforced through experience. When obedience is rewarded and questioning is punished or dismissed, the nervous system learns quickly. Compliance feels safer than agency. Silence feels safer than speaking up.

Decolonizing begins by noticing this conditioning without shaming ourselves for compliance. Awareness is the first act of reclaiming power.

We hesitate when we consider acting without permission. We feel unsure to trust our own knowing. These are not personal flaws. They are understandable responses to systems designed to centralize power and curtail agency.

Nervous System Patterns of Compliance

Dependency is held in the body as much as in thoughts and beliefs. When obedience has been associated with safety, the nervous system may orient toward appeasement, self-silencing, or shutdown. These patterns are often early adaptations that supported belonging, survival, or protection.

From a somatic perspective, reclaiming agency involves building the strength and resilience in our nervous system to help us tolerate uncertainty, exercising choice, and self-direction. This builds gradually through small moments of noticing, resourcing, and staying present when familiar patterns arise.

We may notice tension in our chest when authority figures speak, or fear in our body when we imagine saying no. These sensations invite listening rather than overriding ourselves once again. We can use somatic mindfulness practices to work effectively with fear and strengthen courage as we challenge conditioning and authority.

Decolonizing includes honoring these adaptations as intelligent responses while systematically creating conditions for aligning with our strength and values.

Reclaiming Moral Autonomy

Blind obedience requires surrendering moral autonomy. Responsibility is handed upward, and agency diminishes. Over time, we may come to believe that we are not capable of making wise choices, especially in complex or uncertain situations.

Reclaiming power involves restoring our capacity to discern, question, and respond in alignment with our values. Moral autonomy grows through practice and develops as we learn to stay present with discomfort rather than reflexively complying or withdrawing.

Responsibility can feel heavy and at the same time is closely linked to dignity and vitality. When we take responsibility for our choices, we also strengthen our capacity to change. This process reflects a movement toward maturity, both individually and collectively. It feels good to work for the world we want to live in.

Personal Power and Collective Power

Collective power emerges through relationship, accountability, and shared values. It takes shape when individuals are supported to think, feel, and act with integrity, rather than surrendering responsibility to authority.

Decolonizing invites reflection on how shared power might be expressed in families, communities, and institutions. It opens questions about distributing agency rather than concentrating it and how to support each other in speaking truth to power.

As we reclaim responsibility for our own lives, our capacity for shared problem-solving, mutual care, and community resilience grows. Dependency begins to wane as trust develops, both within ourselves and between one another.

Living the Questions

Conditioning works because it begins early, is pervasive, and is linked to safety in our body, mind, nervous system and belonging in our community.

• Where do habits of compliance still live in my nervous system?

• What supports us in staying present and grounded in our own values individually and in community?

• How does reclaiming personal responsibility strengthen collective resilience?

Questioning authority is one of the ways we come into alignment with our values and strength. This is more welcome in some circles than others! 

Join us in our Sunday free community class to deconstruct conditioning and speak truth with each other. Details here.