Opening Your Heart When the World Feels Hard
We live in a time of fear, uncertainty, and distress — political, environmental, financial weaving through our personal lives. Threat puts our nervous system in survival modes of fight/ flight/ freeze.
We lose access to our hearts. We suffer and those around us suffer. We can't offer kindness to others when we're cut off from it in ourselves.
Come back into the present moment. Look around the room, notice where you are, and notice you're safe right now. There are many dangers in the world. There is no imminent danger that needs you to jump into action.
Let your body move, take a deeper breath, and soften your shoulders. If you’re feeling antsy (ready for action), stand up and shake it out. If you’re in a quiet numb freeze response, gently try a few breaths.
Neuroscience gives us clues to opening our hearts, starting with ourselves. Our brains don't register positive experiences unless we deliberately put attention on them for 20–30 seconds. When we realize we don’t have to respond right now to imminent danger, we can afford to lower our guard.
What gave you a moment of warmth or joy today?
I’m excited that the hummingbirds are back! My garden peas are poking up through the earth. What comes to mind for you? Maybe it’s laughing with a friend or feeling cozy inside listening to rain on the window.
How does that feel in your body? Take your time.
We don’t have to earn kindness or compassion, especially not our own.
Perhaps you feel a bit more settled after savouring some moments of joy. Your breath has more ease and your body is more relaxed.
Can you offer yourself kindness? With your hands on your heart, can you feel a warmth and compassion for yourself now?
If you feel numb or your inner critic resists, try this: bring someone you love to mind and offer them kindness first. Once your heart has softened a bit, extend some of that toward yourself. Most of us find it easier to give someone else a break and understanding.
The blessing of a kind open heart
Allow yourself some grace. Practice being on your own side. Acknowledge times you may be in a fight/ flight/ freeze response and not acting as your best self, or you’re immobilized by a mean inner critic. Especially then, we can pause, breathe and open our heart to ourselves. We are suffering already and we don’t need to make it worse by harsh judgement.
May I know the blessing of a kind open heart
May I know the blessing of giving and receiving kindness and compassion
May people I love know the blessing of a kind open heart
May people I love know the blessing of giving and receiving kindness and compassion
May people in my community know the blessing of a kind open heart
May people in my community know the blessing of giving and receiving kindness and compassion
May all Beings everywhere know the blessing of a kind open heart
May all Beings everywhere know the blessing of giving and receiving kindness and compassion
Much harm in the world comes from people in survival mode with closed hearts.
Opening our heart changes us and it changes the world. We can practice connecting with patience and kindness to ourselves and each other. We can't do this alone.
Come back to this practice whenever you notice you're activated, critical of yourself, or shut down. It can feel like a risk to open our heart.