Deep Conversation and Laughter
We are in a period of heightened tension and worry. It helps to watch our thoughts so we don’t fall deeper into a trance of catastrophic thinking. Our brain believes what we think. Instead of increasing alarm through trying to prepare for worst case scenarios, it also helps to redirect our attention.
In my interview with neuropsychologist Dr Rick Hanson, he spoke about pulling weeds and planting flowers. Pull the weeds - be mindful of catastrophic thinking and worry that takes over and alarms us. Plant flowers - focus on what you enjoy, breathe, relax, be around nurturing people. I wrote about that last week, Fear and Worry November 2026 Edition.
We’ve been working with Deep Listening for the last six weeks. We did a 12 day Lovingkindness Practice together. Perhaps that has provided a balance to the fear in the world and we’re feeling more regulated and open in our connections.
Let’s add good conversation
Build connection that goes deeper than small talk. Instead of asking a generic “how are you” when you meet with someone, here are some specific questions that may bring you deeper into satisfying conversation. Then follow up on one thing in their response and perhaps share your experience with them.
What’s something you’re looking forward to this week?
What was the highlight of your day?
What’s been on your mind lately?
What did you do recently that you enjoyed?
Tell me about something you’ve been learning or reading.
What’s the best thing you’ve eaten recently?
Who or what made you laugh this week?
What’s something small that went well today?
Is there a place you’ve been thinking about lately?
What’s keeping you busy these days?
What is a recent time when you felt relaxed? When you felt more hopeful or less anxious?
I enjoyed reflecting on some of these. My dog Shantih tops the list of who or what made me laugh this week. I laugh several times a day at her goofiness and charm. A few times a week I’ll put on funny dog videos on YouTube and we’ll watch together. The videos are funny and her response is too! The comic Josh Johnson comes up on my Instagram and I enjoy his humor.
A place I’ve been thinking about lately is Cape Breton and I went there a few weeks ago. The reason I’m excited about it is because it’s the setting for a novel I just started writing! It’s been thirty years since I’ve seriously written fiction and I’m loving the process!
An ongoing highlight of my day is signing on each morning to daily practice. I love being able to connect with people through Zoom and Insight Timer, and to guide a practice that helps and connects. I’m on twice a day for the next few weeks. I need the calming effect too! Our nervous system doesn’t like uncertainty and there is a lot of that right now.
Let’s notice and nurture these small moments of laughter and connection together.