When nervous system dysregulation is at the root of someone monologuing at us, what are our options? This might be someone we care deeply about and want to be there for. What does it cost us to be subjected to their dysregulation over time? Do we consent?

It is hard work to remain grounded when we’re around people with dysregulated nervous systems.

We can’t change the past. We can’t transform our parents into lovingly supporting us. If they have done their own work, that’s a bonus.

We ourselves can take on the job of extending empathy and supporting ourselves. We can stop the inner critic attacks.

We can learn to be consistently reliable and kind to ourselves. We can be the “good enough” parent we didn’t have.

Who can you invite to be on your side? To support and encourage you? To provide unconditional love and encouragement?

Visualize your inner nurturing community in a semi circle around you. They are kind and honest and supportive. They have your back.

Invite the inner critic into the circle. We are listening to your concerns. What is it I need to know? Why are you here?

I’m On My Own Side

What would have to change for this to be more true?

• Know who I am

• Nurture a connected, empathetic relationship with my mind, body and breath

• Stop shaming and criticizing myself so I can

• Respect, accept, and honor myself

If we all cultivated more kindness for ourselves, that would be a worthwhile practice in 2024.