“Ending the gender binary is a world without gender policing, where people are able to look like they want and love like they want, because it’s their life and their body. We have to look at how we’ve outsourced that
Welcoming and Freeing Ourselves
Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation
I had sexual feelings for another girl when I was fourteen, but I had never heard of lesbians or gay men. I didn’t know it was a possibility. I lived in a small town. My parents never said anything about
To Know Me Is To Love Me
I was speaking with a friend recently about our mothers and I said “I don’t think my mom loved me.” When I had my last conversation with my mom she was in hospice. I told her “I love you” and
Fat Shaming
Was food restricted in your house? Was a parent ashamed of you because of your weight? Did you grow up hearing a parent expressing contempt for their own body or weight? If you were labelled fat as a child, were
Your Parents Did the Best They Could AND …
This does not change the fact and impact of your own experiences – you were and are affected by your parents’ unhealed trauma, neglect, and abuse. You have the right to set boundaries, and take physical and emotional space to
Indigenous Intergenerational Trauma
How do we take in the enormity of pain in ourselves and each other? It’s like the stinky sludge in the bottom of a swamp, where we are almost used to the pervading aroma, then the wind shifts and we
Someday my prince will come?
We are conditioned to believe we are “less than” without a successful relationship as defined by the dominant culture that centers the nuclear family as the right kind of family. Heterosexual. Male and female parents with children. Someday my prince
What is Conditioning?
A deficiency story or core belief is formed early in life and involves negative judgments about ourselves. Common deficiency stories include “I am unlovable”, “I’m stupid”, “I’m not good enough” or “I’m disgusting”. There is a sense we are inherently
Freeing Ourselves
Like Pavlov’s dog, we are all conditioned. All the way through human history, our likelihood of survival has been higher when we are included in the family or immediate community. We will do pretty much anything to not get kicked